Gordon is a moron - Jilted John

Ive been going out with a girl, her name is Julie
But last night she said to me when we were watching telly
This is what she said

She said, listen John I love you, but theres this bloke I fancy
I dont want to two time you so its the end for you and me

Whos this bloke I asked her, Goooooordon she replied
Not that puff I said dismayed, yes, but hes no puff she cried

Hes more of a man than youll ever be

(RIFF)

Here we go, two three four

I was so upset that I cried, all the way to the chip shop
When I came out there was Gordon, standing at the bus stop

And guess who was with him, yeah Julie, and they were both laughing at me

Oh, she is cruel and heartless, to pack me for Gordon
Just cos hes better looking than me, just cos hes cool and trendy

But I know hes a moron, Gordon is a moron
Gordon is a moron, Gordon is a moron
(RIFF)
Here we go, two three four

Oh

shes a slag, and hes a creep, shes a tart, hes very cheap
She is a slut, he thinks hes tough, she is a bitch, he is a puff
Yeah yeah, its not fair, yeah yeah, its not fair

Im so upset
Im so upset, Im so upset, yeah yeah……………….(yeah yeah, its not fair…….)

I ought to smash his face in
Yeah, but hes bigger than me in he
I know, Ill get my mate Barry to hit him - hed flatten him
Yeah but Barrys a mate of Gordons in he

Oh well, I dont care

I dont care, I dont care, cause shes a slag, and hes a creep
Shes a tart, hes very cheap, she is a slut, he thinks hes tough